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Dortmund have done it again – their CR7-inspired goal machine is Germany’s saviour
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Endrick is busy sitting down seniors & Fortnite dancing on their graves
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We’re happy to announce that Pep Guardiola has just two-footed Mikel Arteta
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David de Gea has somehow rattled Man Utd fans from beyond the footballing grave
Some fans need to step away & go outside.
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Remember Hakim Ziyech? He might have just won next year’s Puskas Award
An utterly ridiculous strike.
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Gabriel Jesus sprinkled samba magic around the Emirates with hold-up play that would make R9 weep
Ridiculous footwork from Jesus.
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Go the the Hamburg derby for the culture & stay for the most batsh*t crazy own goal of 2023
'Howler' is an understatement.
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Get Endrick on a plane to Madrid ASAP – he’s already morphed into a golazo-obsessed Galactico
He's ready to take the world by storm.
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The USMNT’s star man set the Champions League alight with a sublime game-winning golazo
What a talent the USA has.
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Europe’s biggest clubs are queuing up for Brazil’s new maestro & his monstrous right foot
He's just announced himself to the world.
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Only Sergio Ramos could be sent off twice in two minutes – & leave commentators in hysterics
Ramos has done a Ramos.
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Remember Isco? His latest f*ckery has sent an opponent to an early grave
The playmaker is living his best life at Betis.
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Kevin De Bruyne has swapped cutting passes for cutting shapes & our brains are fried
Don't quit the day job, Kevin.
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Darwin Nunez vs Pep Guardiola is the WWE main event we love & think we deserve
These two are box office.
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Milan’s R9-inspired punk rock striker prospect is ready to take Serie A by storm – and he’s only 15
Italian football is in safe hands.
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Man Utd & Liverpool are falling over each other for Ireland’s absurd trophy collecting wonderkid
Sam Curtis looks like Ireland's next great export.
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All hail Harry Maguire’s renaissance – so good he’s finally won over the Ghanaian parliament
The strangest plot ever thickens.
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Argentina’s newest crown jewel is creating a golden generation & ripping apart the U17 World Cup
Argentina have been living in dreamland following…